I must admit we are not the most religious family. Christmas doesn't have the meaning to us that it does to others. Ok, I'm Jewish, so of course it doesn't have the meaning to me that it does to so many others. That doesn't take away the fact that it's still a special day. To me it's a day for family. To show love, to receive love. I wasn't in the holiday spirit this year. Too much going on. Christmas and the shopping and running around and being cheerful was just one more thing. I couldn't do it. Evan being in the hospital last week didn't help. But today, today I finally feel a sense of peace. Maybe it's the fact that the year is winding down and I am looking forward to the new year.
A new year holds so many possibilities. So much that is just waiting to happen. I have such hope in my heart that this is going to be a year to remember. The year that Evan will stand on his own, maybe even take a step or two...The possibilities are endless.
2010 was not a bad year. In fact quite a few good things happened. After losing my job shortly after Evan was born, I was absolutely devastated. I was angry and felt hopeless. Instead, it became one of the best things to happen. I got a new job. I was lucky, I am lucky I actually love my job. I realize I am lucky to say that. Not many people like their jobs, much less actually love it. I love that I make a difference in peoples lives. I love the people that I work with. I love that I have their support when Evans needs require me to miss work.
We moved to a new house this year, that I love. It just feels like home. It's warm and comfortable. It's home.
For the most part as I reflect back, there were more good days than bad. I think like many of us when we are in the midst of hard times it's all we can see. Little things that would ordinarily be passed over, feel like huge burdens to carry on our shoulders. I have hope for a year that holds happiness and health for our family. I suppose that whatever is in store we can handle. We are a family, a strong family and as long as we are together we can make it.